Welcome to The Perspective Shift! A weekly newsletter by Ryann Nicole designed to help you see food, your body, and healthy living in a whole new light.

Are your emotions really ‘too much’?

My 14-month-old daughter is very strong-willed.

And honestly, I love that about her. I hope she carries that fire with her for the rest of her life.

But—oh man—does it test me. Every. Single. Day.

The other morning, she was throwing a full-on tantrum because I dared to gasp put her jacket on before going outside in the 20-degree weather. I could feel my heart rate rise, my patience wearing thin, and for a moment, I wanted to snap.

But as I took a deep breath (or three), I realized something: Her big emotions were triggering mine. And if I couldn’t regulate myself, how could I help her through hers?

And that got me thinking…

Something To Think About

So many of us learned how to respond to emotions by watching our parents.

Maybe you grew up in a home where big emotions—yours or theirs—were met with silence, anger, or dismissiveness. Maybe you were told to “calm down” or “stop crying” instead of being guided through what you were feeling.

And without even realizing it, you might’ve internalized the idea that emotions are “too much” or that they’re something to shove down and ignore.

But what if emotions weren’t these big, scary things to avoid?

What if they were simply signals—like a dashboard light in your car—telling you something important about what you need? Feeling frustrated might mean you need a break. Sadness could be a cue for comfort. Anxiety might be nudging you to slow down and check in with yourself.

Something To Ask Yourself

Take a moment to think about what you learned about emotions growing up.

• How did the adults in your life respond to their own emotions
• How did they respond to yours?
• What story did I create about emotions as a result?

What would it look like to rewrite that story? To believe that emotions are safe to feel, that they’re here to guide you, and that you’re allowed to honor them without judgment?

Something To Try

This week, focus on regulating the small emotional dysregulators so the big ones don’t feel like the straw that breaks the camel’s back.

Here are a few small ways to practice:

Pause when you feel the “little” irritations: Someone cuts you off in traffic, your kid spills something again, or a text stresses you out. Take a slow breath and notice what you’re feeling instead of reacting immediately.

Check in with yourself throughout the day: Ask, “How am I feeling right now? What do I need?” Sometimes it’s as simple as drinking water, moving your body, or stepping away for 5 minutes.

Name the emotion out loud: “I’m feeling frustrated.” “I’m feeling overwhelmed.” Naming it gives you power over it.

When you practice regulating the small, everyday moments, you build a foundation for handling the bigger waves of emotion. You’re teaching yourself that you can hold space for your feelings, even when they feel uncomfortable.

And next time the big ones come—like, say, a toddler refusing her jacket in freezing temps—you’ll have the tools to respond, not react.

Because you’re not trying to be perfect. You’re practicing, one breath, one pause, one moment at a time.

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See ya next week!

xx, Ry