011. Want to have a better relationship with yourself? Try this!!

acceptance; ryann nicole

Written By:


Ryann Nicole

Episode Transcript

Hey, it’s Ryann from Coffee Talks Therapy Podcast. Today, let’s dive into the patterns of all-or-nothing thinking and how it can impact our emotions and overall well-being.

The Pitfall of All-or-Nothing Thinking

Our thoughts have the power to make life harder than it needs to be, especially when we fall into the trap of all-or-nothing thinking. This mindset categorizes things as either good or bad, creating emotional extremes.

About Me

I’m Ryann, a mental health therapist, fitness enthusiast, and lover of chocolate chip cookies. Join me in this authentic space where we explore improvement tips, therapeutic strategies, life hacks, and inspiring stories.

Identifying All-or-Nothing Thinking

Recognize signs of all-or-nothing thinking in statements like “I’m a success or a failure,” “I’ll eat all of this or none of it,” or “I’m always going to look this way.” These extreme beliefs make our emotions swing dramatically.

Addressing Extremes

Today, let’s discuss five statements that can help shift your mindset away from extremes and toward a more balanced perspective.

Five Statements to Adopt

  1. You can be okay and also need help:
    • Challenge the notion that needing help signifies weakness.
    • Recognize that it’s okay to seek assistance, acknowledging your limits or optimizing your time.
    • Embrace the middle ground where you can be okay and still ask for help without feeling inadequate.
  2. You can accept your body and still want to change it:
    • Break the dichotomy of accepting your body or wanting to change it.
    • Acceptance doesn’t mean absolute love for every aspect but choosing not to reject your body.
    • Embrace the idea that you can accept your body while being open to change.
  3. You can overeat and treat your body with respect:
    • Acknowledge that overeating happens and doesn’t equate to failure.
    • Avoid the cycle of guilt and restrictive behaviors post-overeating.
    • Live in the middle where overeating is a natural part of life, and you can still treat your body with respect.
  4. You can love your body and still be uncomfortable in it:
    • Even with a positive body image, accept that discomfort can arise on certain days.
    • It’s not about love or hate but acknowledging discomfort and seeking ways to feel better.
    • Shift to a mindset where your body’s comfort is a variable, not a binary state.
  5. You can eat dessert every day and still be healthy:
    • Remove the unhealthy label from certain foods.
    • Recognize that enjoying dessert doesn’t make you unhealthy.
    • Separate the emotional charge from food choices and live in a balanced, middle ground.

Challenge Yourself

Identify areas in your life where all-or-nothing thinking dominates. Whether it’s about your body, food, lifestyle, relationships, or emotions, notice the patterns. Challenge yourself to find the middle ground, and gradually shift away from extreme thinking.

Shifting your mindset from all-or-nothing thinking to a more balanced approach is a game-changer. It allows for greater emotional regulation, reduced guilt, and a more positive relationship with various aspects of your life.

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Ryann Nicole

Licensed Therapist, Certified Nutritionist, and Virtual Wellness Coach

Ryann is a licensed therapist and virtual wellness coach who has assisted individuals worldwide in establishing a healthier relationship with food and their bodies.

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Ryann is a licensed therapist and virtual wellness coach who has assisted individuals worldwide in establishing a healthier relationship with food and their bodies.