📲 Instagram: @moderndaygf
🖥 Website: themoderndaygirlfriend.com
Buy Ariana’s Granola (and use code 15FLOURISH for 15% off)
I’m just so excited to honestly just pick your brain on all things just like joy and happiness and lifestyle. I feel like the biggest thing that is kind of missed in regards to just like creating this happy lifestyle is just realizing that it really comes down to the simple things in life. And I feel like your platform does such a good job at sharing that. You know, it’s always like about what can I have or what more can I do? And sometimes it’s really just noticing like, what can I make the most of? Or like, what do I already have that I’m not necessarily appreciating? Or like, anyways, I’m just really excited.
Well, thank you for that. I take that, I hear that and I take that in. And it’s, it’s hard to, you know, when you say that, I’m like, really? That’s what I do? You know, you don’t see that sometimes of yourself. And so when you hear somebody else say it, you’re like, oh, my, why, my reason, it is actually coming through and connecting. Because, you know, we’re all our own worst critic. So thank you, I hold space for that and I appreciate that.
Yeah, so thank you so much for being here. I so appreciate it. So for anybody who doesn’t know you or hasn’t found you on Instagram yet, which will obviously connect them to you by the end of this, but tell us a little bit about who you are and what it is that you do.
My maiden name is Arianna Themopolis, very Greek. And I recently just got married. So my new name is Salyard. I started the Modern Day Girlfriend a few years ago and it started out as a relationship website because I was in a relationship at that time that was kind of going in two different places. One, because we were young, but also two, Instagram was just like unveiled. And it was really when you could really work from like your computer anywhere and emails and this and that. And we were just young and I have to be honest and say, like, I was looking at things online and Instagram and seeing these beautiful couples and doing these trips. And I’m like, well, why can’t I have that?
But, you know, and like, why isn’t our relationship like this and why don’t you treat me like this? And why are our photos blurry? Like, every little minuscule thing, right? And then so, we were just two different places, wanted two different things, was probably one of the best relationships, or breakups that I could have gone through, not because it was great to break up, it was one of the worst ones, but it really taught me a lot, and it kind of led me on the path to start writing The Modern Day Girlfriend Because I was always that person that people went to for advice And I don’t know why I was like eight or nine, but I would be like, oh, okay This is this sounds like something you should do or like just I would listen to people
So I was going through this and I realized that through this breakup, other people were going through the same thing. Um, and that comparison game on the internet and just relationships. And so I started just writing about it. And then, you know, I was in a space where I wanted to start dating again, but I went the route of like dating apps and meeting people through Instagram. And so I shared that and how to do that safely and how to do that to keep your own sane mind and just writing those experiences and being ghosted and all of that stuff. So that’s really how the modern day girlfriend came about. It has had many different faces throughout the time because I grew and with that, you know, it’s because it’s my career, it’s my job, you know, you change jobs, you change careers.
Most do if you’re like unhappy, you know, so not saying that I was unhappy, but I just, my why was changing. Or, you know what, I have to step back from that for a second. My why wasn’t really changing because at the end of the day from the beginning till now my why was always I wanted to help at least one person resonate with one person inspire one person in power one person just to live their life joyfully fulfilled so I just that my why is always stayed the same but how to get there changed and so yeah And so Yeah, so now You know for a couple years after that I was doing that Hurry up and wait trying to catch up with everybody and just trying to like stay relevant and make sure I was doing You know everything that they say to do with your content and this but not really putting my voice and my why behind it and as I as I progressed in that also, you know, I, certain things, just as a human, you go through it. I went, I had eating disorders, depression.
Um, my learning difference really caused issues with me of feelings like my self-confidence, my mom got sick, she got diagnosed with cancer. Um, and that was really what projected me to this space of not necessarily food as medicine, which I do believe, but just that food is the connection between, you know, your overall health, your mental health, your physical health, you know, your stomach is your second brain, is your second mind. So you have to treat that well. And you also have to treat your mind well. So I know that was a very long answer to your question, but that is who I was and who the modern day girlfriend was and how I have kind of my trajectory has changed, but who the modern day girlfriend is and who I am today and what I share from relationships to the most important relationship is the one with yourself.
Yeah, no, I appreciate that so much. And it’s funny because I always looked at it as like the modern day girlfriend of like, you know, girlfriend as in like girls’ girlfriend. So like, but I feel like it can be interpreted in so many ways, but I don’t know if that was the intention. Change it from girlfriend from guys to girlfriend to girlfriend, or if it goes back and forth to both.
Thank you for saying that because it’s so interesting. You know, when I got engaged and when we got married, people are like, Oh, are you going to be the modern day fiance? You’re going to be the modern day wife. And I was like, even though I have that trademarked, because that’s a lesson always trademarked yourself. But, um, no, it’s, you know, a girlfriend is not just to your significant other. A girlfriend is to your friends, it’s to your siblings, it’s to your co-workers, and most importantly it’s to yourself. How can you be a good girlfriend to yourself? Like if you’re gonna give advice, if you’re gonna love on your friends, like you have to treat yourself like how you would treat your friend, you know? So I really appreciate you saying that.
Yeah, definitely. I mean, yeah, it is so funny to like having it from on the outside, you know, and like seeing how other people view it and being like, oh, oh my gosh, like I didn’t even realize. But I mean, that’s how I’ve always interpreted. And I think that that is a word that can go so many different ways. But that’s what’s so great about it. And that’s why I love it so much.
And I love your platform so much is it’s just the real rawness of us like being a girlfriend before we unpack some of the things that you just said, because you said so many good things, I wanna go back and I’m just really curious, when you started blogging about the modern day girlfriend from a relationship standpoint, and addressing some of those things and the comparison and all that kind of stuff, because I feel like that is such a real thing that everybody can connect to, especially with social media now, like being on social media and being like, my, my relationship on the outside when I’m not on Instagram, like it’s great, and it’s awesome.
And then all of a sudden, I start scrolling Instagram, and I’m like, wait, is it that great? So like, what did you notice, like, as you were blogging? And as people were maybe like, DMing you and reaching out to you, what were some of the things that people were maybe most insecure about or asking you about or just like feeling bad about.
It was really the comparison game of like, how do you deal with seeing your friends, you know, having trips or going on trips or going out to lunch and it’s so cute and it’s all curated and all of this. And there’s two things that I always say, it’s like not everybody is who they post to be. Like, you know, what they put online is not, it’s a snippet. It’s a snippet of their day. And most of the time it is curated. So like you could see this beautiful photo, but it could have been the hundredth photo that they took together. There could have been an argument there could have, you know, you never know.
So, or it could have been a great day. Like you can’t, you can go either way, but it’s just that self comparison and how not to compare yourself to that. And if you have great communication with your partner, if you have a great relationship with your partner, and I’m not saying that like, oh, it’s a great relationship, nothing’s wrong or you never fight or anything like that, but you know, you find, you find why you guys work or why your relationship works. Because, you know, I noticed as well, especially when I was starting out, when people were posting things about their relationships, like they, it was kind of more like self validating, like look how great my relationship is.
But then behind the scenes, it wasn’t. And like six months later, people were breaking up or, you know, they, you would be around them and they would be constantly fighting because of social media, because they needed to get this shot or they needed to do that. And so it was just, you know, you have to stay focused on your relationship. And that’s no matter if there was, you know, back in the 1950s or, you know, 2021, like have to really focus on your life and your relationship and really nurture that.
How do you take like what you learn from the comparison piece like in regards to relationships and apply that to comparison and just general life? Because I feel like with especially what you do for work now and doing like, you know, so much stuff on social media, but also just the world we live in today. Like, how have you navigated that comparison piece just in your life now? And how do you not let that get to you?
Well, I would definitely be lying if I said it doesn’t get to me and I don’t let it affect me from time to time or even have like a moment a day where I’m just like, like, why am I not growing like this person? Why am I not, you know, why are my photos, they don’t look like this? And like, I would be lying if I said I didn’t have like a moment, probably a day that, you know, that happens.
But I also have moments that follow that right after that allow me and take me for the rest of my day that I’m like Why I don’t have photos like that or why I’m not growing like that is because that’s not my journey That is not where I am supposed to be. I am uniquely myself I have my own voice I have an my reason for sharing is something completely different than anybody else’s and I might be sharing Something that is relatable that other people, you know, and I hope that I’m sharing something that is relatable, that other people can connect to and see themselves in, but every story is different.
And you have to just really value your story and not that you’re like, oh, I’m this great person. I, you know, why aren’t people following me? You have to value the trials and tribulations and the joys that you had to go through because they made you who you are today. I share what I like to follow and see.
That’s why I love following you as well because seeing what you post and what you say, for me, I’m like, oh my gosh, there’s somebody who gets it. I went through this and our stories are different, but like what you share is so helpful. And I believe like I’m a person that, you know, my eating disorder, my, I, I don’t, for me, I don’t really believe you’re like ever a survivor of that. It’s something that you deal with, you learn to cope with better. And like following you, even for me, being 31 years old, I’m like, oh, I’m still learning about this. And following you, I’m like, okay, I can do this. You’re giving tools and you’re you’re real and you’re you’re honest and you know, I You know you attract what you put out and so I really am so glad that we connected on social media as well And I’m just I love following your account. You’re awesome
Thank you and right back at ya. And the way that you said, like, value your story, I’ve never really heard it put in that exact wording, but I love that. Like, that idea of just, not necessarily that you have to, like, own your story because there is hard parts to it, but just, like, valuing it in the sense of realizing that, like, every moment has some kind of purpose. Not saying like everything has to be great, right? Like, was my eating disorder, was my struggle with binge eating something that was a great part of my life? Absolutely not! However, I value it because of everything that it helped me learn and grow and teach me and it brought me to where I am today, right?
It’s like, I wouldn’t be this person if that didn’t happen to me. And so valuing your story and recognizing the past is the past and not to be ashamed of that. And I feel like that too is where so much comparison stems from, is just this idea that I have all of this baggage that I cannot fix. And instead of feeling like you need to fix it, value it and be like, look at who this has made you become, look at what you’ve gotten through, like look how strong you are. And so I love that perspective, I think that is so spot on and just kind of like an aha of just like, if you can change your mindset to be like, how can I value what I’ve been through? How it kind of can just reorient yourself to be like, yeah, I am pretty freaking amazing and like, this is why I’m me. And how boring would it be if we were all the same?
And I really believe in those, in that mind shift. It’s just like simple words that you can tell yourself every day. Like as for when I used to work out, I used to work out because I wanted to work off everything that I ate and trying to get out of that, you know, I got into a stage where I was like, I have to work out. Darn it. Like, I don’t want to work out. I just like, you know, you ebb and you flow and then you can get scared of falling back into that. But I switched that mindset to be like, oh, I get to work out.
Like how lucky am I that I’m able to like work out and get my body moving and whether it’s, you know, outside or, you know, if you have a home gym now, because it’s 2021, because of COVID, but you get to work out. So it’s that mind shift of just using different words. So it changes your perspective on how you view life.
Yeah. Would you mind touching on your eating disorder a little bit, because earlier you said you learned how to make food kind of a medicine, and how it is a medicine, and how, I mean, so much of your content, which I love because I’m so not a cook at all, is just like, first of all, healthy foods, but easy, healthy foods that also taste good. So how you kind of were there, and how you got to where you’re at now with your relationship with food?
I know I can go on for a while, so I’ll make it really short. Yeah, I used to be so scared of food, so frightened. From bulimia to anorexia to workout bulimia to binging and purging, like everything, just I was so scared of it. And that lasted for a couple of years. And so that really did a number on my mental health, my physical health. And it really, you know, I, I, I didn’t grow out of it. Cause you really, I, you don’t, and the coping mechanisms were there, but I always had this kind of like, Oh, I can’t eat that. Cause I will, I’ll gain weight. I will, you know, so it wasn’t how am I like, and we always ate very healthy in my family.
And I like to say that I’m a health eater, but I guess I am, but I, I love, I love a good chip. I love a good bread. Like I give me bread and I’m, I’m a happy camper. So to get to the point, so it shifted when my mom got sick because she was actually writing a cookbook called food for a thought. And it was all about comfort food that made healthy. And that was always, she always made like comfort food for us, but it was healthy. It was made with, you know, like fresh fruits, fresh vegetables, olive oils, things like herbs. Um, but seeing her go through and fight for her life, the way that she kind of even shifted more into healthy eating and use that as like medicine to fuel her.
I was so intrigued by and it just was like, Oh, I, you know, I’ve suffered with my eating disorder. I had because, well, I don’t know. I also had food allergies, but the damage I did to my body, you know, I would eat something and I’ll be like run to the bathroom or I would be in such physical pain eating one thing. Like I would look like I was 20 months pregnant. Like it was crazy. So I was like, oh, I need to shift the way that I’m eating. Like if it can help her, help me with this, like horrible gas that I have, you know? Like, so I just started shifting and seeing what worked for me, what didn’t. I always knew I was lactose intolerant, so that was something that always, but I paid more attention to stuff that I ate if it was made in the same factory or whatever.
So that is what made me shift, was watching my mom and her writing that cookbook. And it was something that I knew that was important to my why and my journey and what I wanted to share, because I think a lot of the times as well, we kind of think like, oh, if it’s organic, it’s healthy, it has to be expensive, or it has to have like 20 different instructions. And it’s the power that you can get from a smoothie, a power that you can get from a salad, a power that you can get from like energy bites, like is incredible.
And so I want to be able to share what I’ve learned and like what I’ve, what has helped me and do it relatably, realistically, affordably. and I, that’s how the modern day girlfriend and where it is now has kind of come from. Have it be with recipes or lifestyle. It’s just, I want it to be relatable and affordable because I don’t want anybody out there to feel that they can’t live their life joyfully, if that’s even a word or more, you know, because it’s too expensive.
Yeah, and also so overwhelming and like realizing, you know, you don’t have to do all these crazy things or have all these wild ingredients of things that you’ve never heard of to make something simple and delicious. And then also something that I work with with a lot of my clients and just people in general that are really struggling, like getting back to a healthy relationship with food is like regaining pleasure in food, but also like understanding what feels good in your body. Like just like you were saying, you were like, I realized that like lactose just really doesn’t sit well with my body. So like, I’m not gonna eat lactose, but like, also, how can I still have things that make me feel good?
And so like, when you’re reestablishing this relationship with food and like figuring out what makes me feel good, that doesn’t always have to be like the healthiest, healthiest version of things. And like going back to your mom making this cookbook out of comfort foods that are a little bit healthier. I love that because I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with like comfort foods or like even having the real deal. But I do think that there is a difference in changing some of the ingredients that just like feel better in your body. And that also makes this like mindset switch of not necessarily like I can and I can’t eat this, but like, I prefer this just because it makes me feel better.
Example, let’s take spaghetti and meatballs, or meat sauce. I have no problem eating it with full blown ground beef. Nothing wrong with that. It’s delicious, however, it kind of hurts my stomach because it’s really rich and I don’t eat rich foods like that all the time. And so like I prefer it with ground turkey and there’s nothing again wrong with having it either way but just like realizing what feels good in your body and that’s what I love about your recipes is I feel like they’re kind of framed around how can you make this healthy thing taste good but feel good. To all be like, okay, how can I regain this pleasure around food and not be so scared of it, and actually enjoy it so I can be energized and move on with my life?
Exactly, and I definitely, I hear you on that, and I 100% am like, I’m right there with you. And for me, it’s too, for like, from where I came from to where I am today, like, I don’t have anything that is like restrictive to me in the sense of like, I’m not going to eat that because I shouldn’t eat that because it’s supposedly bad for me. I don’t eat it because it will, it’s something in there is I’m allergic to it. My body just doesn’t process it properly. So like I don’t ever have those, like, I don’t really have like cheat days because I have what my body craves.
And I feel like if you deprive yourself of something, you’re going to crave that more. And then you’ll have more days where you’re craving things that you shouldn’t. And you eat that, which it’s just like, you want something, have it moderation. And like, even last night, I’ll be honest with you. I was trying to figure out with my husband cause I was like, I was up all night long. I had a salad with Romaine iceberg lettuce. I, and I was like, wait. And he goes, babe, your stomach hurts every time after you eat lettuce with iceberg. Have you noticed that? I’m like, no, I have it.
And so I was like, thinking back, I’m like, Oh, he is right. Cause I’m just so used to it not feeling well, you know? And I’m like, Oh my goodness, you’re right. And me, I’m like, my body craves like bread. We like, you know, brown rice, even white rice. Like to me, there’s nothing better than a bowl of white rice. Like I love white rice so much and like, and I’ll have it. But to me, what’s so funny is I’ll have a bowl of rice or even I’ll have some pasta and eat that and I feel energized and awesome. And I’ll have a salad and I’ll feel like poop. And so it’s just really figuring out what your body like works best with.
Totally, totally. I appreciate that so much. And just kind of normalizing that like things that feel great for you might not feel great for somebody else. And just recognizing that like we all process things differently and then also things just like work differently in our body. So going off of that and going more into the cooking stuff, I’m like very, very basic with my cooking. And I would even say that I’m like way better than I was, but I just like, am not great at mixing flavors, like trying new things. So like, what tips would you have for people that aren’t proficient in cooking, but like want things to taste good or want to kind of just like up their recipe game?
I always start with salt and pepper. Always remember that.
It is, it really is. So always just start with that, the seasoning, salt and pepper. You can also, if you wanna use like the Himalayan pink salt, that’s always great. But just like that is basic seasoning. So baseline, that. But also too, I was always the chef when I first started out. I never measured anything. I don’t even chef a cook. Like I used, I would never measure anything, just toss it all in. And it always ended up fricking delicious, you know? But what I would say, my basic things that I always put in just to like flavor something is onion powder, garlic powder.
Or like onions, garlic, fresh, also because they have great like nutrients and things like that for you. And then like you can’t ever go wrong with chili powder. I like to put a little bit of turmeric and black pepper because the black pepper helps your body absorb turmeric. So even when you drink that as well, you want to put a little bit of black pepper whenever you have turmeric. So, we eat a lot of beans or if we do vegan meat or black beans, we season it with that. So I really just think like those are the basic ones that we do, because they bring a lot of flavor in different meals that you make.
And you can also just get a tomato sauce if you’re doing pasta and just butcher it up with a little bit of your garlic and onion powder. But I think when you’re really using fresh fruits and vegetables and whether they’re also frozen, like fresh fruit, just let those really, like their flavors speak for themselves. Because fruits and vegetables are really beautiful in the way that they taste naturally. And know when they’re in season as well.
Yes, yes. That is something that I’ve learned the hard way. Just like wanting to be like such a brat about like, but I want this right now. Why is it not in season? But I love all of those things. So tell me, because I have a lot of clients that struggle with just like dinner ideas, whether it’s, they have families that don’t like leftovers, so they’re just like constantly trying to figure out like what should I make for dinner? What are some staple dinners that you have and like really like in your life?
We meal plan every week. So we typically meal prep snacks and yeah more so snacks than anything, but meal planning is really helpful because then you can go to the grocery store and know exactly what you’re doing every night and use everything use everything because that’s how we cook we use everything and even though like like and also to that’s why I don’t share like a thousand recipes a week because I you know, it that’s a lot of food waste because we also Can’t eat all of that in a day, you know, so So meal planning is really important, knowing what you’re going to get.
It helps save money. But also too, what we used to do, which we don’t do anymore because we don’t really eat chicken anymore, but you would get like a, or go get a whole rotisserie chicken and you can make like five different meals from that. You can make tacos, you can, I’m trying to think of all the ones that we used to do and I have it on the modern day girlfriend as well, but you could also make stock from it, from the bones.
Yeah, we use some stir fry sometimes with that too. I feel like rotisserie chicken is another thing that’s so underrated and it’s really not that expensive.
Like yeah, you can use so many things from it. That’s just like, and you can meal plan that and prep that for the week ahead as well. And usually like a rotisserie chicken that you get out of the grocery store can feed a family of four throughout the week. So make different dishes with that as well. So it is really, really strongly suggest meal planning. But yeah, just finding things too that also you can incorporate into different dishes as well.
Yeah, yeah. I’ve kind of made a game of that too, where it’s like, okay, if I have these ingredients, how can I like use them in different ways? And like, you know, I do more of like a food planning where I like to keep everything separate and then kind of like mix and match them. But same thing too, like how can you use things in different ways I think is such a huge deal.
To kind of shift gears because I know that you have a happiness component to your thing and that is something that I really wanna address because I know especially right now so many people are struggling, just like feeling lost in life as there’s been so many changes, like struggling just in general of just like finding happiness or what that looks like. Whether they are just like completely sucked into social media or their life is just not how they want it. Like, how have you really cultivated happiness in your life? And like, what tips do you have for those like, that are kind of struggling with happiness right now?
A lot of things came to my mind first. I know people say this and at first I rolled my eyes at it too, but just journaling and really just writing out every day. Just what I do is I, you know, I first just write. I just wake up and I let my brain go and I just let whatever needs to get out, out. And then I start with like gratitude. I do at least five things that I’m thankful for and just finding those five things and they can be as small as, you know, I’m grateful that I hear the birds chirping. I’m grateful that I can move my big toe. Like little things like that, that, you know, if you’ve ever stubbed your toe before and broken your toe, it really can mess up your day. So like, so just something like that.
And, and then I write as well, like, you know, I can get into my head and be like, Oh, I’m not good enough. This is not working. But then I sit there and I’m like, okay, all right, like, I’m not good enough. Well, no. Why do I feel that way? Like, no, I am good enough. And this is why like I, I have those doubts come out, I write them out, and then I confront them. So I do that. So I suggest, you know, just working through those emotions and just writing them out, because getting them out of your body is just so like helpful and And, you know, getting out for like 15 minutes a day, if you can, just to walk outside, to breathe fresh air, to let the sun hit your skin is huge. And even if you can’t get outside, open a window, get fresh air. Just being able to, and I love, once a week, I will, we either go to the beach or we’ll go to the park and I take off my shoes and I just, I ground myself.
So let my, like I connect to the earth. And that might be like hippie dippy for some people, but just to me, it’s that like, I don’t know if it’s because I’m a Pisces, I know Pisces should love water, but like, it’s just something that innately, I just like love, I love the earth. Like I love the air, the grass on my feet, like I just ground myself again for like 15 minutes and just the Sun hit me kind of like meditating that moment and then also to like the biggest thing and I tell my friends this all the time when we talk and you know suffer with anxiety or depression I’m like have your day like feel it you’re human don’t think that you can’t feel sad or depressed or angry like have your moment have your day and yet tomorrow you might wake up and feel the same way but if you do try it try journaling if you didn’t do that the day before and try to find the true like reason why you’re feeling that way like what is causing that and then what can you do to kind of like shift that perspective of okay I might feel this way but this is what I’m gonna do so it doesn’t bother me that that much or it I this is what I’m gonna do so I feel better today and it’s not like an overnight thing sometimes it’s just like, okay, it’s gonna take a month or two.
And also too, if you are feeling, the biggest thing I can say is if you’re feeling this overwhelming sense of sadness and heaviness and depression or just like uncertainty, ask for help, call a friend, call a loved one and just be like, look, I don’t need you to say anything. I don’t need you to do anything. But I just need you to listen. I need to get it out somewhere. I need an ear. Or this is how I’m feeling. Do you have a suggestion? Because sometimes I feel like, I know for me, when I was dealing or when I have those moments, I don’t want to put my emotion and depression or something on anybody else. And it’s something that I learned also to communicate with my husband where I’m like, oh, okay. Yeah. Like I, I feel this way and I don’t want it to affect how I treat you or how I am, you know? So it’s just the biggest thing I can say is if you’re really finding yourself in this hole of sadness or uncertainty, like, talk to somebody, talk, get it out.
Yeah, yeah. And whoever’s listening, you can come to either of us if you need to talk it out. What I love about the things that you just said is first and foremost, they’re not like over the top positive. Sometimes I feel like when you’re in that mode where you’re just like not happy, like being like, all right, I’m gonna look in the mirror and say like, my life is great and like all these things. Sometimes it’s like over the top positive where it’s like, that’s annoying and that’s not what I want right now. But I also love the simplicity of everything. Like it is something where it’s like, okay, that seems so simple, it’s almost dumb.
But like, those are the things that you need when you’re in this kind of mode of just like, I just feel like crap and I, I don’t necessarily know why, but I still can’t pull myself out of it. And I also love how you look at the day and you ask yourself, like, if you’re still feeling blah, after a day where you did kind of allow yourself to feel and maybe do a little self-care and you’re still feeling that, like looking at the day before and saying, was there something do in the sense of like, did I not journal or did I not journal everything? Or is there like something still missing that, you know, maybe I need to look at?
And I really, really like that. I also really like the exercise of just kind of challenging your thoughts. I think that is huge. And that is something that, you know, when you write it out on a paper and you like are writing out the thoughts that you’re having but also writing out, okay, but is this true? Or like, how can I kind of counteract that? It’s kind of like, you know, you can see it transpire out that it’s not necessarily that way. And you can almost talk yourself out of it on a piece of paper. I love that. So going from that, what are some things that you love to do for self care? What are some self care rituals that you have when you are having these days where you are just feeling flawed.
I kind of laugh at that because my husband laughs at me because I love to clean. He’s like, that’s not doing something for yourself. I’m like, but it is because when our house is chaotic and dirty, then that’s where my mind is.
Yes, I feel that so much.
So I actually love to clean, but I also love, I love, and it’s like, I love to bake. I love to like do that. But I also love to just like my self care of just, you know, surrounding myself with the people that I love. And now during COVID, that’s like, you know, calling them up or FaceTiming them. You know, my, my dog, my rescue dog, or our rescue dog, Tater Tot, was like one of the best things I’ve ever done in my life. She brings so much joy to my everyday. She’s just pure love and joy.
So just spending time with her, and just like, honestly, I love, I love, love connecting with people, and I love listening to people and hearing their stories and that might sound weird that that’s self-care for me, but to be able to give back, it’s like that thing where it’s like, do you like getting gifts or giving gifts? And the best feeling in the world is giving something to somebody, you know? And there’s nothing more fulfilling to me than being able to give back to somebody and have that be just listening, like, it fuels me up and fills me up with this like amounts of love and gratitude. So like, I just, I love doing that as well.
I love that so much. And I think it’s important to recognize that self-care does look different and it can be different. It doesn’t have to look a certain way. Some days it is cleaning the house and other days it’s watching Netflix.
Oh yes, I mean I’m probably on my third round of like the Great British Bake Off. I’m obsessed with that show.
I love those shows partially because I don’t cook that kind of stuff so I’m so mesmerized by it and it just amazes me like what people can bake and do with these things. Love that. Okay, so to wrap this up, what I always like to do at the end is just do a fire speed round of questions for people to get to know you better in a way that you don’t normally talk about. So getting to know the modern day girlfriend just in a different way. So answer with these, just first thing that comes to mind. Are you ready?
Oh my gosh, okay.
Okay, I love this one. What is a food combination you love but other people would think is weird? I literally put seaweed on almost like everything.
So, ugh. Oh, I like put seaweed in my salad and it could be like a Greek salad. So like, olives and seaweed. Super weird.
Oh my gosh. What like, just like the packs of seaweed that you just like crunch up and what do you like about it?
This is the salt the crunchiness of it. Ooh It’s like I might yeah, my salads are always so weird. My husband’s like you’re disgusting Sauerkraut seaweed like all the probiotic kind of stuff. Give me all of them
What is something that you can’t live without?
The first thing that came to my head was my husband and my dog.
What about a product?
Okay, this might sound like I’m plugging, but I’m not, even if it was, because my family and I, we started a food company called Flourish, body, mind, and soul, because the O-U-R in Flourish is R, so R, body, mind, and soul. Our chocolate chip granola, our chocolate chip cookie granola, is literally my favorite thing to eat.
That sounds so good.
It is so fricking good. I eat like a bag a day. I eat it out of the bag. It’s so good. So that is like a food that I can’t live without.
Do you put it on anything or do you just eat it as is?
You can put it on yogurt. You put it on yogurt, you could put it on pancakes, you could put it on a smoothie, you could just eat it as is. It’s sweetened with maple syrup, so it’s no added sugar. It has chia seeds in it. It’s old-fashioned rolled oats and gluten-free, non-GMO, kosher, all of that. So it’s like, I mean, it is literally fricking delicious.
Yum, oh my gosh. I will definitely have that linked in the show notes. That sounds so good. Do you have a morning routine?
My morning routine, wake up, snuggle Tater Tot a little bit. Then we go and snuggle the hubs. Then we go outside, she goes pee. I come back in, I journal for a little bit, and then I will go like wash my face, brush my teeth, make some coffee, work out, and then get my day going.
Love it. What is a skincare product you’re loving right now?
A skincare product that I’m loving right now is actually from MONAT, and it is their oil and it’s both for like your skin, your lips, your hair and it just has like not only changed my hair and the health of my hair but also my skin. I’m like obsessed with it.
Ooh. What time do you usually wake up in the morning?
Weekdays or weekends?
Oh, let’s say weekends.
I try to push it to 8 but I’m probably up at like 7, 15, 7.30. On the same lay. I’m like, if I can wake up at eight, that’s like such an accomplishment.
What is a habit that you’re trying to break or would like to break right now?
It goes back to what we were talking about in the beginning, and I just think it’s like, you know, I’m human. It’s that sense of trying to just not compare myself to others.
Yeah, yeah. What’d you have for dinner last night?
I had a Greek salad, but not with the seaweed and olives. So don’t worry, it wasn’t that. But I had a different one.
And if you were a coffee drink, what would you be and why? I make this latte almost every morning. It is just like pour over coffee. And I put a little bit of like stevia, but then I put MCT oil and collagen in it and almond milk. And I like froth that all together, or I froth the almond milk and the collagen together and put that in with the MCT oil and the coffee and it’s so good. It’s like, I go to bed dreaming about making it.
I’m the same way with my coffee in the morning. Where can everybody find you? What are all your socials and good stuff?
Okay, so they can find me on my website at the modern day girlfriend calm on all other social it’s just Modern day GF so Twitter Instagram Facebook you just plug that in Pinterest as well modern day GF For our food company our granola. It’s flourish Underscore body mind soul. We’re on Amazon and also sell off our website, which is flourishbms.com. And if you head over there and purchase there, if you use 15 Flourish at checkout, you can get 15% off of the granola there. Yeah. So any of your listeners that would like to try out the granola and that’s that’s it.
Yay! Well thank you so much again for coming on and just sharing all of that. Again, I just like appreciate your realness and rawness and I just feel like it’s so nice to have somebody to connect with that feels like, you know, just a girlfriend that you can call on when you need. just a girlfriend that you can call on when you need. And that’s what I appreciate your account or about your account and just like appreciate about you because that’s what I feel like the vibe is that you give off and what I feel like is so needed right now.
Thank you, I feel the same about you and I love following you and just like learning from you as well and just, you just, what I feel when I follow you and see you in your posts and your stories, like I’m like, You are completely authentic and relatable. And it’s so, it’s so refreshing to see. And it’s so like, I love everything that you share. And I’m so grateful that I found you too, because you really helped me on my journey. So thank you for everything that you do.
Licensed Therapist, Certified Nutritionist, and Virtual Wellness Coach
Ryann is a licensed therapist and virtual wellness coach who has assisted individuals worldwide in establishing a healthier relationship with food and their bodies.
I understand—it can be overwhelming to figure out where to begin. Let's simplify things and have you start right here:
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