---

Connect with Lisa

📲 Instagram: @thoughtfullyfueled

🖥 Website: https://thoughtfullyfueled.com/

Episode Transcript

Ryann

Hello everybody, welcome back. This is our third episode of our three-part series with Lisa, really diving into some of the most, I don’t want to say controversial topics, but just some of the topics that need a little bit more clarity. And I wanted to bring Lisa on with us because she’s a registered dietitian and also a certified personal trainer. And so with all of these topics, she’s able to really give her expertise in regards to the biological portion, and then I’m able to bring in that mental and psychological element. So our first episode, if you missed that, was all about hunger and fullness.

Our second episode, which was a banger, which is all about sugar. And now I was just telling Lisa, I had no intention of planning this from going from least spicy to most spicy, but it just kind of worked out that way. And today we are diving into all things, restriction, what happens with restriction, how to identify restriction, some of the effects of restriction. Lisa’s gonna talk all about the biological effects of restriction, and then I’m gonna dive into the mental components. So if you are struggling with restriction, if you’re struggling with some of the symptoms of restriction like binging, overeating, feeling crazy around food, not being able to stop thinking about food, this is your episode. So Lisa, thank you so much for doing this. I’m so excited.

Lisa

Oh, I’m so excited too. And I love that we kind of like took those baby steps and now we’re in this spicy one. And like you said, they all build on top of each other. So I’m very excited for this topic.

Ryann

All right, let’s go ahead and just kick things off with, I would love to know, just like, just basic, like how do you define restriction? Like when you hear restriction, where does your head go?

Lisa

Yeah, so I think, and this is probably common for everyone, when I think of restriction, first place that I go to is limiting how much food we consume. Could be a specific type of food, like it could be one food group, one macronutrient, could be food in general. And that’s the general gist, right? Everyone thinks restricting means less food going into our body. But there’s all these other forms of restricting, and I don’t wanna get into them if you have more questions, but I think it’s kind of this like big, big picture and we tend to focus on just one aspect of it.

Ryann

So when, like just kicking things off with that, when we are simply restricting the amount of food that is going into the body, not even talking food groups, we’re just talking about the amount of energy going into the body, not getting enough. What happens biologically when we don’t give ourselves enough physical energy that it is asking for?

Lisa

Yes, and I think the easiest way to put this is, I will mention calories. I’m not gonna say like specific numbers, but the word calorie is gonna come up because calorie means unit of energy, right? We know that there’s calories in food. We know that that food then provides our body with energy. So when we lower our calorie intake, it immediately boosts our hunger. Like that’s the body’s initial response. It’s like, oh, my calorie intake is lower than it normally is. So I’m going to send those hunger cues to my brain to be like, hey, I That is the first kind of step when our calorie intake is lower or when we are restricting. Then as the restriction progresses, maybe it’s getting worse, you’re restricting more and more calories, or it’s going over an extended period of time, then all of these things start to build on top of each other. that’s when we can see some actually really severe biological changes that the body goes through.

Ryann

Will you talk us through some of those changes?

Lisa

I will. The first one that I like to, it kind of goes along with like boosting our hunger, but it slows our metabolism. So again, the body is reacting to, I have a lower intake of calories. So my metabolism is going to slow down. So now what energy I am consuming or what energy the body is getting, it’s able to utilize that because it’s kind of slowing all of our unnecessary functions down. So step number, or after that initial step of like sending hunger, it can slow your metabolism. If this goes long enough, we can start burning through our lean body mass. So our muscle mass, when the body doesn’t have the fuel that it needs, it’s gonna resort to some of those storage forms and muscles have energy in them. So it can start to break those down.

Another one is fatigue, nutrient deficiencies. Obviously, if you’re not consuming adequate food, your nutrient levels are gonna be lower. Your energy levels are gonna be lower because we don’t have that energy inside of our body. It can also be nausea, headaches, constipation. There’s not enough fiber to move things. Mouth to south, that’s my phrase for that one. A common one in women is loss of their period, fertility issues, like that is a huge red flag when you are restricting enough that the thing that is so natural to a female, your menstrual cycle that comes every single month. I say that, that’s not always the case, but it’s supposed to come every single month.

When that goes away, that is a huge sign that I’m not giving my body enough energy to bear a child. Like it’s saying, no, this process that most women can do cannot happen for you because your energy intake is so low. That also then leads to weakened bones. So osteoporosis or just, you know, like having osteopenia, which is pre-osteoporosis, just that weakened bone density, it impacts your immune system. So many things just kind of like start to shut down because we don’t have enough energy. And we talked about this a little bit in I think the last episode, but the body knows, like it has this kind of hierarchy of what systems do I need to function on a daily basis. So I’m talking like brain function, heart function, like pumping blood through our body.

And then all the other systems are below that. And it slowly just starts like knocking those systems out when it doesn’t have enough energy. So the body really responds drastically to restriction and you might be thinking, oh, this is if you went from eating X amount of calories to like no calories at all. No, this can happen with any small piece of restriction. So it can be the smallest little difference in calories or different ways of restricting that I’m sure we’ll talk about too.

Ryann

Yeah, I really appreciate you saying that right off the bat because I think that it’s so important for us to start recognizing these as symptoms rather than problems because I know for me, I used to get so frustrated like when I was in major diet mode, like why am I eating less but my body isn’t changing or why am I eating less and my workouts are sucking or like why is this going? Like I would always bring it back to what is wrong with me.

And I think that when we’re going into that mental element of not only looking at the physiological changes that are happening in our body, but also how our mental health plays a role in that, when these changes are happening in our body because we’re not getting enough energy, and then all of a sudden we start shaming and blaming ourselves for these things that are happening, that are just simply symptoms of not getting in enough food, then we spiral down this major attachment to food as defining our morality. And now it’s not only about the changes that are happening in our body, but now, okay, there is something physically wrong with me and blaming ourselves when this is really not anything to do with us being broken or anything wrong with us. It just comes down to not eating enough.

Lisa

And I love that you brought up like, oh, I’m eating less, but my body’s not changing. And that’s because your body is so aware of that change in energy that it’s like, whoa, whoa, whoa, I need to hold on to everything. The last thing it’s gonna do is lose weight, like eliminate energy that it could be using to help you do all the things that you need to do. So that’s always kind of like, we look at that as, oh, what am I doing wrong? But that’s like the body giving you this big SOS signal, like, hey, no, we’re not changing anything because I’m not getting the energy that I need.

Ryann

Yeah, and really quickly before moving on, I have to play devil’s advocate because I know this is what came up for me is, okay, well, why do some other people restrict their calories? They’re fine and they lose weight and I’m experiencing all these crazy symptoms.

Lisa

Yeah, and I think that goes kind of full circle. It’s like, you can always say that a diet does work because in the short term, it does. You might see a change in your body if you drastically reduce or restrict how many calories you are consuming. But how many times have you done that? Are we yo-yo dieting? And our metabolism is just so far from that set point. How many, you know, what is the mental component? There’s so many things that go into it. And this might’ve been the first time that that person has tried, or it might be their fourth and it might be your 14th or whatever the case may be, they are so different than you. You can’t compare how one body responds to something that you are doing because you are two separate humans, two different biological systems that are functioning.

And it’s just, I know we do it all the time. It’s very easy to compare and be like, oh, well, she stopped eating carbs and lost X amount of weight. And I did the same thing and nothing’s working. And then that blame and that guilt comes, right? But you’re so different. And what works for her might not work for you. And realistically, what is working, I’m doing heavy, heavy air quotes right now for her, it might not be healthy for you. And maybe it’s working that one time, heavy air quotes again, but the next time she’ll have the same struggles. It’s such a devil’s advocate conversation because when people say diets don’t work, you have to be like, well, yes, they do short term, but they don’t work long term.

And when you look at all the things that it changes, like all those biological symptoms that I just named off, like impacting your metabolism, losing your period, lowering your bone loss, you get to the point where like, why am I putting myself through this to just weigh a little bit less or to try to look like some Instagram model or whatever is going through your mind. You have to remember that everyone’s body is different and the body that you are meant to be in, there’s a reason that you are the way that you are. And it’s because you’re beautiful and your body is unique. And like, you have to learn how to embrace it. Like the genetic blueprint aspect of intuitive eating. Like you really have to lean into that and say like my body is unique and I respect that. Like I respect what it does and it is what it is.

Ryann

And biologically what happens is you continue to yo-yo diet?

Lisa

Yes. Yeah, so when you, the word yo-yo dieting just means that you are losing weight to gain weight, to lose weight to gain weight, right? Everyone’s probably lost five pounds to gain five pounds, to lose five pounds, or however much it is. That is what yo-yo dieting is, that constant back and forth, back and forth. And with that, you are sticking to a diet and then restricting, and then it’s too much, or you quote unquote, fall off the wagon and then you gain everything back, right? So when you are going through this, not only does it impact your metabolism greatly, like I said, any type of restriction slows your metabolism.

So each time that you start a new diet, your metabolism is gonna slow a little bit. And most of the time, there’s not enough recovery period between diet number one and diet number two. So you’re just slowing your metabolism to like take a tiny break to then slow your metabolism again, to then take a tiny break. So that’s why the more and more you yo-yo diet, the harder and harder it is to see any change. Yo-yo dieting is also extremely harmful to your heart muscle because when we are restricting, we’re making those like top tier systems work harder than they need to, right? You’re now asking your heart to do the same job just with less energy. So it’s like working on overdrive. It’s beating, it’s pumping, it’s trying to keep you alive.

And then you give it, you know, when you quote unquote fall off the wagon and you stop dieting, you maybe give it a little bit more energy. It’s normal energy. And it’s like, oh, okay, I got this. Then you go back into restriction and it’s like on overdrive once again. So you’re kind of, all those biological symptoms that we were saying, you’re like sprinkling them in and then taking them away, sprinkling them in and then taking them away. And that over time builds up and can be so dangerous for an individual to live like that. Like when we have a weakened immune system, when we have a lower bone density, when we have a lower muscle mass, not only are you super prone to injury and super prone to getting sick, but again, at a biological level, you’re just not functioning at the level that you could, your body’s not living up to, you know, where it could be.

It’s kind of floating in this like safety zone where it doesn’t want to do anything because it’s just not sure what type of energy it’s going to get or what you’re going to ask it to do tomorrow, next week, or the month later.

Ryann

And I think it’s important for us to recognize, thank you for sharing that. That the reason why dieting is so addictive, whereas anything else that provided the same result of, I try it, it works for a certain amount of time and then it doesn’t work, you would be like, I don’t want this product anymore. I want something new. I don’t wanna do this. This clearly doesn’t work. But the reason why we mentally do not connect those dots with dieting is because of the emotional hold diet culture has on us in the sense that as we are growing up, we are constantly being fed these messages that our dream life, like everything that we desire, all of our fantasies, everything that we’ve always wanted is simply a diet away because in our mind, we don’t care about losing weight to the extent that we have defined weight loss to mean what we have defined that smaller body to mean.

And so when Lisa is talking about all of these different factors that happen when we yo-yo diet and when we restrict food and I like to just throw in the word control there because I know for me, I used to be like, I don’t restrict because I quote unquote eat enough. Like I’m still eating breakfast, lunch and dinner and I’m still, you know, whatever. And I think that when we throw in that word control there instead and like say, okay, but like, are you trying to control your food with the intention of like weight loss there? We can bring it back to the reality of, okay, the reason why we’re still controlling, even though we’re experiencing all these other factors is because mentally, there’s a part of us that wants these dreams and fantasies so bad. And we’ve been told that we’ll get them if we just lose weight. And that’s why I wanna just validate your feelings in regards to going back to these behaviors, even though they keep giving you these results because that’s what’s actually going on.

It’s not about the diet and it’s not that anything is wrong with you. It’s that you want these things that you’ve been told a smaller body will give you. But I think it’s also important for us to recognize the reality is that you could lose the weight and still not have the job, still not have the relationship. Your marriage might still not be great. Your parents may still criticize you. And when we put all of the focus on weight loss and don’t do that internal work, we stay on this cycle of restrict, overeat, restrict, overeat, and continue to wonder what’s wrong with us when it’s so ironic that when a diet is working great, we attribute all that success to the diet. And then when it fails, we say, what’s wrong with me?

Lisa

And I love that you brought up the control piece because I think it can be looked at in two ways. You can have the control over the food, right? You are in control of what goes in your mouth, what you’re consuming. So you can have this like control from, okay, I’m trying to say this size or this weight. And then there’s like the flip side, the food can have control over you. I know when I was like in my worst restricting phase, there was no going out to eat. There was no drinks with friends. There was none of that because that food had a control. When I wasn’t, you know, in a space where I could say, oh, I want this, this, and this, or I know exactly what I’m going to be eating. When there was that little piece of like uncertainty, I just immediately was like, nope, not going, cancel plans, not gonna do it.

And that was like the food having control over me and my life and what I was able to do and how I was able to spend my free time. So I love that you brought that control piece up. And I also love to plug in that it doesn’t just have to be food. You can also be compensating with exercise. And from like my personal training background, I have seen this so much. Like if you just looked at the food that they consumed, you’d be like, oh, this is awesome. But then they’re in the gym for however long, they’re doing multiple back-to-back classes. They are practically killing themselves on cardio machines. They are, those people that you see spending two, three, four hours at the gym, and it’s all that mental component being like, oh, I had pizza last night and I have to burn it off, or I had, I’m having this tonight, so I have to make sure that I work out enough so I can have that.

And that is just as much restricting as physically limiting the amount of food that can go into your body. But unfortunately, I think the exercise component, when you are leaning on exercise as your form of like making up for, and I’m doing heavy air quotes here, that isn’t frowned upon as much. It’s kind of like, oh, good for you. Like you’re getting in the gym or you’re, it’s almost praised, especially if you’re in that fitness world. And I can speak from experience, like there’s times where I did that and people would be like, oh, you look great. And now they’re just validating my unhealthy habits that I just did. They have no idea that I barely ate lunch and then did an hour long, you know, workout where I was like on the verge of passing out and wanted to throw up and was like seeing death the entire time. They have no idea, but they see me walking and I’m sweating after and, you know, they’re like, oh, good job, like high-fiving me.

Ryann

Yeah.

Lisa

And that component is just as, just as damaging as the restriction, like, from food component too.

Ryann

Yeah, oh my gosh, such a good point. And what are some other forms of, I like to call it like sneaky restriction that you might not think of as restriction, but actually are.

Lisa

So obviously the exercise one is probably the second most common. I even like to call restricting like, say you want a chocolate chip cookie, but in your mind that’s bad, quote unquote bad. So then you go for like a Lenny and Larry’s or like one of those nasty protein cookies and you’re like, oh, I’ll do this. That right there is restricting because you’re restricting yourself from having just a normal cookie and enjoying it and moving on. You’re analyzing, oh, well, this is quote unquote better for me. And there’s so many little things like that that I would say is restricting because it all comes back to that control piece, right?

You are saying, I have control. I’m choosing one over the other because I think it’s quote unquote better or however you wanna look at it. Those are the three most common. So like physically limiting how much food, exercising and then like the little swaps and switches. Those are the three most common that I see but I’d be interested to see if you have any others.

Ryann

Yeah, and I just wanna put like a quick disclaimer on that before anyone like comes in hot and spicy and is like, but what about health? And I think that it’s so important for us to recognize that sometimes a healthy swap is not always healthy for us and always looking at your intention behind it. So with Lisa’s example, notice how she said, this is bad. So I’m going to have this one, which I have deemed good. That swap is purely based on connecting our morality to food. Now, that is different from saying, you know what, I haven’t had enough protein today, I’m in the mood for something sweet. So even though I want a chocolate chip cookie, I’m looking for something with a little bit more like ump and substance. In that example, having the protein cookie instead would be no big deal.

So when you’re doing these swaps, definitely take a note of what your intention is behind this, because yes, there are circumstances where the quote healthier swap is gonna just make you feel better in certain realms of things. Now, let’s check your motives behind that in the sense that, okay, like, if you’re looking for a little bit more fiber and you’re looking for a little bit more grain, sometimes, yes, the whole grain bread might be the better option at that point in time. However, if the whole grain bread is gonna leave you unsatisfied and back in the pantry, in that sense, the white bread might be the better option. So definitely check on your motives, and this is not like an anti-health, this is just being really, really clear on, okay, but what is my intention? Other than that, I would say something that is also very missed is not just restricting the amount of calories, but restricting whole food groups.

So saying, I’m not having bread, I’m not having cookies, I’m not having, you know, whatever, when you are limiting yourself from whole food groups, that is absolutely restriction in the sense that that is different from saying, you know, I’m not having bread because it really hurts my stomach. And this is not a can or can’t thing, but more of a want or don’t want, but when we restrict whole food groups, that can definitely have a toll. And then something really sneaky that took me so long to learn as restriction is bargaining. So saying, okay, if I have a carb at lunch, which let’s say I never have, but I’m allowing myself to have a carb at lunch. If I tell myself, if I have this, then that means I can’t have X later or I need to eat X later or I have to go work out because of that bargaining right there is a form of super sneaky restriction.

And then anything that we put limits on, so let’s say you’re eating something and you’re saying, okay, but I’m having the white rice or I’m eating the food and I’m only allowing myself to have one. I’m only allowing myself to have the serving size. And this is different from you just having one or just eating the serving size because that’s what your body is telling you. When you go into it saying, I’m only allowed to have this amount, that’s also really sneaky restriction right there.

Lisa

I don’t know how I totally forgot an entire food group.

Ryann

That was probably so implied with you, but I mean, I know for me what was really easy to kind of just like catch restriction was taking away the word restriction and just replacing it with control. Like where am I trying to control? Like am I trying to control anything right now in regards to my food instead of just choosing what I want and moving on. When I noticed myself going into control mode, I have to have this, I need to have this, freaking out if I can’t have this, trying to have it be a certain amount, like all of that, it was just like ding, ding, ding. Restriction.

Lisa

And I think I noticed that when I would have a weekend and I would maybe go off my quote-unquote plan or, you know, eat things that I didn’t think were quote-unquote healthy for me. And then Monday, I’d be like, oh, I have to make up for the weekend. And then Monday through Friday, I was like on my A game, quote-unquote A game, whatever that means, you know, really restricting, really controlling what I ate. And then on the weekends, I’d go crazy. Talk about Sunday scaries. I’d have like this guilt fest. And then Monday it was like, okay, no, you have to control yourself again. And I think that is very common as well. I see that with a lot of women who maybe like are coming out of school. And that’s the mentality, like you go crazy on the weekend and then you get back on the bandwagon on Monday.

But I saw that a lot too and I experienced it myself. So I love the tip of like, not saying restriction but using the word control because then that like opens your eyes instead of just thinking, oh, I’m limiting the amount of calories that I’m consuming. When you say control, it’s like, oh my gosh, no, I’m trying to control all these different things, all these different scenarios that revolve around food or exercise. And then you’re kind of able to just take it all in and realize how much it’s impacting your life.

Ryann

Yeah, and diving deeper into that control word, I know that I’m sure you relate to this as well. So many of you reach out to me and saying, I just want to feel in control of food. I just want to feel in control again. And I always like to kind of reframe that in the sense that I never want your goal to be being in control of food, because the thing that is not recognized with control is that control always requires energy. And after spending so many years using so much energy to try and control your food, I don’t want you to be in control of food. I want you to be unfazed by food. I don’t want you to have to even think about it other than when you’re hungry and choosing what to eat, you eat and move on.

I want you to just be like, okay, am I gonna have the cookie or am I not gonna have the cookie? Make that decision and it’s not a big deal because you know you can have that whenever you want. I want you to be unfazed. And so when you’re asking yourself, okay, like what your goals are, and when you say, okay, my goal is to feel in control again, I want you to kind of challenge that and look at, is it really that you want to be in control? Or can we switch that to being unfazed? Because honestly, I think that that’s something that we really need to work towards. I don’t want you to have to think about this any longer.

Lisa

And I think the stepping away or kind of like giving up the control, that is the hardest thing. I know with my clients, when they’re starting intuitive eating, and I mean, there’s no rules, there’s no guidelines, there’s nothing to follow. And that’s the biggest thing I get. They’re like, I don’t know what to do because I’m so used to having rules or having control over things. Like they’re so used to essentially having it all written out and like planned and someone telling them, yes, no, this is what you can have, this is what you can’t have. And then when you take that away, they kind of flounder for a little bit because they don’t know what to do without controlling everything that goes into their mouth or every way that they move their body. And when you take a step back, and like you said, when you’re unfazed by those things and you learn to listen to your body and do movement that you enjoy and you look at health from a broader picture, not just the food that I put in my mouth.

Yes, that is a component. Yes, there’s huge health benefits to having a well-rounded meal, but there’s so many other components of health. And when we take the pressure off of the food, we’re then able to give a little bit to all those other health components. And that’s where like overall health and wellbeing really stem from, in my opinion. When you’re giving to all those little buckets, right? You’re being mindful of what you’re eating. You’re moving your body in ways that you enjoy. You’re focusing on your mental health. There’s all these other things instead of just hyper focusing on one of those buckets.

Ryann

Yeah. Now I wanna dive into something that I feel like is the kind of missing link or the missing puzzle piece and putting things together when any of you feel like, okay, I’m not restricting. I’ve begun my intuitive eating journey or I’ve begun letting go of control and now I’m eating everything in sight and I feel crazier what the heck is going on.

And it is super important for us to chat about the mental or emotional restriction piece that goes on that has a huge role in this and I would say it’s honestly the biggest component because this is truly the difference between let’s say ethical vegans or vegetarians restricting a whole food group and having no issues at all and then let’s say me choosing to be vegan because I will just want to lose weight and I’m thinking that that’s gonna be the answer and that’s gonna keep me from eating all the ice cream and then still feeling crazy around food. The difference there is mindset and the judgment and the shame. And I mean, I would love to hear your thoughts on that.

Lisa

Oh, I totally agree. I always say it’s more about the why. If you are an ethical vegan because that aligns with your beliefs, a hundred percent, like that makes so much sense. And you are, my guess would be, if you’re an ethical vegan, you’re not freaking out or so controlled about what foods you can and cannot have. And your motive is not, oh, I’m going to lose weight. It’s, oh, I’m doing this for a cause that I believe in. And they know the foods that they can consume and like to consume and they do it and then they move on. And that mindset piece or that why behind it is so, so important. You can have food freedom, you can be an intuitive eater, you can practice mindfulness, whatever route you’re going, you can do all of this and still have dietary, I don’t want to call them like limitations, but like if you’re allergic to dairy, obviously that’s not something that you would go crazy on when you are allowing all foods to fit. But we have to go through that little rebellion phase.

That’s what I like to call it. The phase where you’re like, ooh, I allow cookies and now I can eat cookies all the time and I am. You have to allow that little rebellion phase because you have to get to the point where you realize, if I eat cookies every day for every meal, I’m going to feel sick. That’s my experience. I think you have to have that experience, that personal like, aha moment, because so many people can tell you if you eat cookies every day, you’ll feel sick. But until you actually believe it, it sticks more. And then that turns into having cookies in the house and only having them when you would like them. So it’s going through this journey and everyone’s is gonna be different based on the rules that you have around all these foods, how long you’ve been implementing these rules, who taught you these rules. Like each food is gonna be so different for everyone else.

You might be able to say, oh, cookies, not a big deal, but maybe like a freshly baked croissant. It’s all going to be different for everyone, and that’s okay. And you have to just kind of take the control aspect out of it, really lean into, I’m experimenting, I’m learning about myself, I’m learning what works, I’m learning what doesn’t work for me. And what works for me isn’t gonna work for you or isn’t gonna work for your best friend’s sister because my thoughts, beliefs, rules that I once had around food were so different and I had to navigate through that. I had to have these lived experiences that the next time I’m like, ooh, five cookies, I could eat five cookies. I’m like, yeah, I could, but I know I’m gonna feel sick. So maybe I have to. And then if I want more, I can have more.

But knowing that about yourself helps that process just become so much more real instead of getting stuck or being fearful of starting that food freedom phase because it can be scary for someone to just be like, oh, no rules about food, eat whatever you want. Like that in and of itself is so intimidating. Um, so if you are like teetering there, I always say, start with one food. Start with something that you have a food roll around and like dip your toe into it and see what it feels like to have that food in your house. And how it feels to have that food after a meal or before a meal or as a meal. And just take it step by step. It’s not like open the floodgates and let all your fear foods just like smack you in the face. You can do this at your own pace.

Ryann

Right, right. And I know there’s a lot of fear in the sense that okay, but every time I’ve had this, I don’t feel sick. And I just want to eat all of them. And I just want to bring attention to the psychological novelty effect that is just innate within us with anything when you initially have something that is new or that you don’t allow yourself to have all the time, yes, it’s gonna feel very exciting. However, the more that you have it or the more that it’s around, the less exciting it becomes. And if you don’t believe me, let’s just think about your phone for a second. The first time you get a new phone or we get a new update, it is like the coolest thing ever. And then a few days later, we’re okay. It’s not a big deal. Recognizing the novelty effect and also the abundance effect when we have complete abundance of whatever it is that we want, we know that, okay, I can have this whenever I want.

So I can make this choice now. Now I can say that and you can say that, but you won’t believe it until it is truly proven to you that you can have cookies whenever you want, so you don’t need to eat them all now. And something else that Lisa said that I wanna bring attention to really quickly is how she said, okay, if I have five cookies, I might choose to just eat two because I wanna feel well. And this is something that I talk about with a lot of my clients is, I want you to think about the difference between you and the most normal eater that you know. I’m talking like the eater that can just leave like three fries left on their plate and they just like don’t want them and you’re like it’s three, why are you eating the three fries?

And the biggest difference between you and the most normal eater has nothing to do with willpower, it has nothing to do with control. It’s all about thought process. The reason why they’re able to leave the three fries or they’re able to have a little bit of ice cream without it being a big deal is because it’s not about their morality. It’s not about being good or being bad. It’s about, I wanna feel well. And I know that even having these three extra fries is gonna push me over the edge and I’m gonna have a stomach ache or I’m gonna have ice cream, but I’m not gonna have the whole pint because I know that’s not gonna make me feel very well. And coming back to how powerful our thoughts are around feeling unfazed around food.

Lisa

I love that. And I think that is the, like icing on the cake. When you’re going through like this food freedom phase or the rebellion phase, when you get to a point where you can choose, I’m gonna have two because it’s gonna make me feel well and I know five doesn’t. That right there is so empowering because yes, you could say like, I had control over that situation, but my motive behind it, my why behind it was so different. It wasn’t, I’m only having two cookies because this is the serving size and five is, you know, you can go on however you want to spin that. But you’re saying, I’m going to have two because I’m going to feel really good after and I’m going to feel, I’m going to feel satisfied. And then if I get to the point and I’m like, nah, I kind of want another one. I can ask myself, I can check in and be like, oh yeah, like one more 30 minutes later, totally fine.

The difference between that and the first scenario of thinking like, I can only have this and going into that, I call it the mean girl voice inside your head. That is so different when you silence that mean girl and you are talking directly to yourself. She’s not talking to you. You are talking to yourself. You’re asking yourself, do I want this? Am I gonna feel satisfied? How many is gonna make me feel satisfied. That is so empowering. Unfortunately, that comes last in the journey. But when you get to that point, it’s like, oh my gosh, you just feel so unfazed by every eating situation because you know you can have more or less or come back for seconds or have more food in an hour. Like, you know that it’s not this big deal and that just takes so much of the pressure off.

Ryann

Yeah, and something that you can do today because this is a journey and it is gonna take time challenging those thoughts and rewiring what you believe about these diet rules that you’ve been told over and over the one switch that you can make today and this will help really well as well if you are one of those people that have legit medical restrictions that are struggling is to make the mindset switch that there is no more can and can’t, no more can and can’t. That is everything that you are putting in your mind. It is simply from here on out a want or don’t want. With anything, even if you have medical restrictions, you can have everything. You literally can. However, the consequences, let’s say you’re gluten intolerant, the consequences are just a little bit high.

That doesn’t mean you can’t have bread. You can have bread. It is do I want the bread or do I not want the bread? Because when I have the bread, I have a stomach ache, and when I don’t have the bread, I feel better. So with anything moving forward, one mindset switch that you can literally make today that will help with eliminating some of the scarcity in your mind is, this is no longer a can or can’t. You can absolutely have everything. The only person telling you you can’t is you. It is, do I want this or do I not? And there is no right or wrong. It is simply a decision. And that is it. And when we can make it into, okay, this is just a decision, we put the power back in our court.

If you remember back to what Lisa said in the beginning of feeling like food is in control of us, that’s because we’re giving food that power. For us to take that power back, it is saying, this is my decision. I can choose to have these cookies. I can choose to have one. I can choose to have none. I can choose to have the bread or the dairy, even though I’m intolerant and have a stomach ache because it’s that good and I feel like it right now or I’m not. Either way, it’s just a choice.

Lisa

I love that. So well said.

Ryann

And I think that just kind of to wrap things up, something that I just want to like touch on quickly before moving forward, continuing with that emotional and mental restriction is that when you are shaming or judging yourself for what you are eating, and I know for me I used to say, I’m not doing that. And I want to just give you a few examples of what that might sound like. It might sound like, ugh, I shouldn’t have had that. This is why I can’t lose weight. I have no control. Why can’t I just figure this out?

Like any thoughts like that is shame or judgment around food. And what is so mind blowing in regards to how powerful our minds is, it does not matter if you are physically putting the cookie in your mouth and eating it. If you are shaming yourself and you are judging yourself while you’re eating that cookie, even though your mouth is chewing, even though that cookie is going into your stomach, it’s as if you didn’t eat it at all. You can still be eating the foods, but as long as you’re shaming and judging yourself for having them, your mind’s still on a diet. And that’s what I see keeps so many people stuck. I would love to know just to kind of wrap things up, just from like a biological perspective, the benefits of bringing in a little bit more mindfulness into your eating.

Like I know that for anybody listening, that was probably like a major, major eye roll as you heard the word mindful eating, because I know that the idea of sitting down at the table with no distractions and eating your food in the beginning can be something that seems really annoying and really redundant. However, the effects of it, the benefits of it are so powerful. So I would love to know from you, just like biologically, when we sit down and we eat our food at a table with no distractions, we’re not running around, like how does our body absorb the food differently when we eat that way?

Lisa

Yeah, well, thinking when we make eating an experience, that’s like how I phrase mindful eating. You’re making this an experience, right? Maybe you’re sitting down at a table, not in front of the TV. You start to digest food before food goes into your body, right? If you start thinking about food, your mouth is gonna start salivating. That is where we first start digesting food. The enzymes in your saliva start slowly breaking things down as you’re chewing, right? But you’re producing saliva before that food has even gone into your mouth. So by taking five seconds, even like smelling the meal or spending a little extra time like maybe plating if you’re eating out, maybe putting it on a plate instead of eating out of the Tupperware or the To-Go container, that starts the digestive process.

So already your body’s primed, it knows what’s coming, it’s like, oh I’m eating food. And then when you sit down and you’re maybe free of distractions or maybe you’re in the phase where like the TV’s not in the background but you’re not watching, you are allowing your body to kind of just take a second. Cortisol levels come down, heart rate comes down, blood pressure lowers. When that happens, now we’re gonna send more blood to our stomach. We’re gonna send all that love to our stomach because now your stomach has a job to do, right? It has to digest all that food once it gets there, pull all the nutrients out as it’s going through your small and large intestine.

Like it knows it has a job to do. And when you just give it a second, whether that’s taking a deep breath, having like a grounding practice, whatever your little mindfulness moment is, it tells the body like, hey, we’re going to do this. I’m going to give you energy and now you’re going to get to use it. And we’re starting that digestive process just a little bit earlier. And then we’re pulling everything out that we can instead of like flying in the door, grabbing food, sitting on the couch, watching TV. Your body doesn’t really know what’s happening because there’s like 17 other things going on. And now there’s food in your stomach and it’s like, oh, we should maybe do something about that. So I’m not saying it has to be like this big, long experience, but take five seconds, sit at the table instead of in front of the TV, do a grounding exercise, whatever feels good to you.

Take a couple deep breaths, allow your body to do the thing that is so natural to it, digesting and absorbing food. You’ll also notice maybe you have less GI distress after, so maybe your stomach feels better after. Maybe you’re, we’re gonna get like, we’re talking biological, maybe your bowel movements are more regular. Maybe your skin starts to look better. All these things, when we take the stress component out, when we just let the body do what it’s made to do, you’re gonna notice a difference from just these small little changes.

Ryann

Yeah, and if that seems really overwhelming to you, just start with one meal. Just start with one meal where you bring in this mindfulness to just see how it feels, see how it’s different, see how it feels afterwards, see how much longer the food keeps you full for. And I know for a lot of you, you’re really busy and you’re mamas and you’re running around and you’re doing all of these different things and you can still bring mindfulness into your eating when you are doing different things. For example, last night I was in this webinar and it was in the afternoon and I was starving and I needed a snack and I couldn’t pull away from this webinar because I was watching it.

So like I needed to have this snack while I was also watching the webinar. So I grabbed the snack and I just kind of like took a bite, I kind of thought about the bite as I was listening to the webinar and then I came back. Or let’s say you are doing some work on the computer, take a bite, chew the bite, swallow the bite, and then get back. When you can just bring in those little things it makes such a difference. So to wrap this whole series up, I would love to know from you just fast advice to anybody who is healing their relationship with food. Like what would you offer right now?

Lisa

I would say that it takes time. So I challenge you to think, how long did you live in diet culture? Was it five years, 10 years, 50 years? You are rewriting all of that. You’re rediscovering how you feel when you eat certain foods, what foods you like and you don’t like. You are rediscovering what your relationship with food is going to look like, and that takes time. So when we say this is a journey, and I’m sure you’re sick of hearing that word, I know a lot of clients laugh at me because I say it probably 100 times a day, there’s a reason that we call it a journey, and that’s because it’s so different, and it takes time, and you’re going to learn new things and go off on this little side street and then come back to that main road and then go over here and learn something else about yourself and then come back to that main road. And that comes down to the mindset.

Do you have that fixed mindset where you have your blinders on and you were just trying to run down the road as fast as you can? Or do you have a growth mindset where you are now open and you’re taking in everything around you and you’re taking those side streets and coming back. And that makes a difference because you can do intuitive eating or mindfulness or food freedom and run full speed ahead down that road and then get to the end and be super unsatisfied. So if you did that, that’s okay because you can start again. The journey can start from where you are right now. It’s totally fine, but it takes time. And being comfortable with the unknown is going to open so many opportunities up for you to learn about yourself during the process.

Ryann

So well said. And to add on that, I would say my best advice is to stop focusing on the outcome and fall in love with the process. This is not, I want to stop binge eating. This is I want to become the type of person who cares for her body, who listens to her body. This is not when will I be at my happy weight. I want to be at my happy weight. This is I want to become the type of person who moves and nourishes her body out of love and feels so good because when you can focus on the little things day in and day out, it is not feeling like this journey is taking forever. It is experiencing and celebrating the little wins. It is acknowledging that every day is different. It is embracing when we do things that don’t make us feel well, in the sense that we can learn from those and move on.

And it’s not going backwards, it’s pushing us forward because we’re knowing and learning things that we didn’t know before. And embracing the journey, like Lisa said, is embracing the journey. Instead of looking at the end, let’s look at today. It is a long process because it is a lot of rewiring. However, I can say, and Lisa can probably attest as well from personal experience, it is the best journey you will ever go on. I do not know one single person that has said, I did this and I regret it. I regret finding food freedom. I regret working on my relationship with food. I regret learning how to do intuitively. I haven’t met them. Haven’t met them.

Lisa

Me either.

Ryann

Lisa, thank you so much again for everything. This was awesome. For anybody looking to connect with you, can you please reshare with us all of the places?

Lisa

Yes. So you can find me on Instagram. I am at ThoughtfullyFueled. You can also find me on Facebook, Pinterest, all the fun. And since you guys are listening, you’ll be the first to hear I’m starting a podcast, which you will also hear TBD on when that is coming out, but that will happen in the near future. So you can find me there as well.

Ryann

Also for any of you that have ever thought about working with me or thought about joining any of my programs, Lisa is our main dietician in all of our programs. So I really love everything to be a one-stop shop and I’m not the kind of person that likes to just give you false information outside of my realm of expertise. I want you to have the best. So in my group coaching programs, Lisa is the main dietitian that will come in and you will be able to ask her any of the questions that you have and it is just, it is really fun. We have a really good time.

Lisa

We do. We do.

Ryann

All right, y’all. Thank you so much for listening again, and I hope you have a great rest of your day. Bye.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Lisa | Intuitive Eating RD (@thoughtfullyfueled)