Is fear of losing control around food keeping you stuck in a binge-restrict cycle? You’re not alone. In this episode, we’re diving into how you can start breaking the cycle by challenging your fear of trigger foods, particularly as the holiday season approaches.

If you’ve ever felt out of control or anxious around certain foods, especially during the holidays, this episode is for you.

🎧 Listen on Apple Podcasts 🎧 Listen on Spotify

HIGHLIGHTS

01:45 The Fear of Holiday Foods: Why It’s Holding You Back

06:15 How to Normalize Trigger Foods and Break the Cycle

10:50 Steps to Safely Reintroduce ‘Forbidden’ Foods

15:30 The Power of Repetition: Eating Without Shame

20:05 Shifting Your Mindset to Enjoy Food Guilt-Free This Holiday Season

RESOURCES + LINKS

⭐️ Starting October 8th, I’ll be offering free live group coaching every week in my Facebook group to support you through this journey. Don’t miss out!

Ryann: @itsryannnicole

Work with Ryann: BingeEatingUnchained.com

Join the IRN Community Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/itsryannnicole

Disclaimer: This podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for professional advice.

Transcript

Food, food, food. It’s like the minute October 1st hits, well, really it’s September 1st now. The food floodgates. Things feel like they open and suddenly it’s like the entire world revolves around what’s on the table. You already deal with that constant background noise of food in your mind, right? Like it’s not like you’re not thinking about it every day, but now there’s no freaking chance of not thinking about food.

It’s everywhere. Family gatherings, work parties, even those cozy nights in everything seems to revolve around food, especially around the holidays. And then before you know it, that familiar thought creeps in. I just got to get through this. Ugh, just gotta get through this. That statement hits me hard because, let’s be real, how much time have you already lost because of food?

Because of the obsession, the binging, the constant mind games around what you should or shouldn’t eat? Maybe you’re thinking, what’s another four months? It’s not that big of a deal. But what happens when four months turns into six, and then another year, five years, and then the cycle just doesn’t stop?

Look, I know I’m getting into it fast, but that’s because I want so much more for you than just surviving the holidays this year. Getting through it. I want you to actually enjoy the holidays, enjoy this time, without being weighed down by guilt or anxiety. And that’s exactly what we’re diving into today.

Quick disclaimer, the information shared in this podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapeutic advice. Even though I’m a licensed therapist, what I share here isn’t to diagnose, treat, or offer specific therapeutic guidance. Okay, so where do you start? You start now, today, with everything that we’ve been working on thus far.

If you’re waiting until you’re standing in front of that holiday buffet, eyeing the Christmas cookies or staring down the office donuts to figure out how you’re going to handle it. You’re already setting yourself up for a tough time. You’re around triggering foods in a vulnerable environment. It’s not the space to start.

So instead of thinking, I’ll just deal with the cookies when I have to, what if we shift this into I’m working on my relationship with food now so I can enjoy every moment later. I want you to literally repeat after me. I don’t care if you’re driving, walking, whatever. Repeat after me. I am working on my relationship with food now so I can enjoy every moment later.

Now let’s talk about getting comfortable with these foods. The biggest mistake I see when people are working on getting comfortable with trigger foods is that they do too much too fast. I love that you’re an eager beaver and let’s add some structure with this.

So you’re setting yourself up for success. Here’s what I mean. This week, I want you to choose one to two specific foods to practice with. Could you do more? Sure. But again, we want to set yourself up for success. So let’s start with just one to two. And when I say specific foods, I mean specific. Don’t just say I’m going to practice with cookies this week.

What cookies? Pumpkin cookies from Trader Joe’s. Great. But what ones? Because they’ve got like five different kinds right now. Knowing exactly which foods you’re going to practice with before you get to the store is gonna save you from that overwhelming moment of indecision when you get there. Once you’ve picked your foods, go get them and then it’s time to create a plan to add them into your daily eating multiple times.

Yes, I said multiple times. This is how we start to normalize them. Let’s say I pick my favorite, the petite pumpkin spice cookies from Trader Joe’s. If those are my food of choice that I’m working on getting more comfortable with this week, I might have a few with my morning snack, then with my lunch, maybe with my afternoon snack, and even with my dinner for a week.

Maybe I’ll try having a few before lunch instead of always after. Maybe I’ll have some with my dinner instead of saving them for dessert. The point is to mix it up, having them often, to show your brain that these foods are just food. Not something that you have to earn or deserve by restricting or saving them for some future, better time.

Now if you’re thinking, I cannot eat that many cookies! This might be a little tough love, but if I didn’t give it to you, I wouldn’t be doing my job. The thought of intentionally eating those forbidden foods multiple times a day might make your heart race a little. It might feel like you’re about to lose control.

It might feel really scary, but let’s get honest for a second. You’re already eating more cookies than that when you binge, right? It might not be cookies for you, but whatever your go to is, you know the feeling, that rush, that frantic, desperate grab for everything in sight because you’ve denied yourself it for so long, that feeling of being totally out of control.

You’re eating the cookies, and likely more anyways. The way that you’re eating them is just different, but that’s exactly why this is so important. This isn’t about eating cookies just to eat cookies. This is about breaking your cycle. Every time you restrict, you’re repeating your cycle. Every time you tell yourself I can’t have this, you’re repeating your cycle.

And the moment you’re back in the cycle, everything goes out the window. It’s no longer you in the driver’s seat, it’s the food. But let’s split the script here. What if instead of running from that fear, you leaned into it? What if you gave yourself permission to have those cookies? Not just once, not just as a special treat, but multiple times a day.

If you try this yet you’re still judging and shaming yourself while you’re eating the cookies, you’re not really doing anything different. Yeah, you’re eating the cookies and you’re eating them multiple times a day, but with your mind still in diet mode, you’re not actually experiencing and normalizing the cookies, meaning you’re gonna feel the exact same way and nothing’s gonna change.

This is having the cookies. Enjoying them and moving the heck on, not making them mean so much. This isn’t you eating the cookies in secret and shame or in rebellion. This is you getting the cookies, putting them on the plate, sitting down, enjoying them, taking a bite, tasting them with intention and with a plan.

That’s the difference. You’re teaching your brain. I can have cookies now. I can put the rest away because this isn’t my last chance to eat them. And I’m actually letting myself enjoy them. And yeah, it’s scary. I’m not gonna sugarcoat that. But how long are you going to let that fear control you? And isn’t it scarier to think about staying the way that you are right now, fearing cookies and letting cookies control you?

For another year? For another two years? Another five years? How many more years are you willing to spend avoiding these foods only to binge on them later? In secret? In the middle of the night? Or in your car when nobody is looking? I don’t want this to be your life anymore. I want you free of this. Which is why we’re talking about this.

I want you to see that you are stronger than the cycle. You deserve to live without this constant battle in your head. So give it a shot. Try breaking your cycle. And you’re not doing it alone, right? We’re all doing it together. Every time you reach for those cookies this week, remind yourself I’m breaking the cycle.

This food doesn’t have power over me. I don’t need to make this mean so much. I’m breaking the cycle. This food doesn’t have power over me. I don’t need to make this mean so much. As you start practicing this, I have a feeling some guilt might creep in. That voice in your head might pop up saying, I shouldn’t be doing this, this is too much, I’m being bad for eating this many cookies.

If that voice shows up, I want you to notice it. Guilt comes from the rules you’ve been taught about food. The rules that say, I’ve done something wrong by eating this. But let’s break that down for a second. Why do you feel guilty? What rule do you think you’ve broken? Is it a rule that says certain foods are bad and eating them means you’ve somehow failed?

Because if so, I’m here to tell you that rule is a lie. There is nothing morally wrong about eating a cookie or two or five. Food doesn’t have moral value and having cookies doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. When you feel guilty, you spiral. You start thinking, I’ve already blown it, so why not just eat more?

And the cycle repeats itself. But what if, instead of engaging with the thoughts fueling the guilt, you could start shifting the thinking? What if you looked at those cookies and said, I’m allowed to enjoy this food. I’m not doing anything wrong. This is reframing the way you look at food. Which, when you work on this now, will make a huge difference when you’re at those holiday parties.

Sure, different foods have different purposes, but that doesn’t make them good or bad. Let me give you an example. Maybe you’ve decided to have a couple of those pumpkin spice cookies we talked about earlier. As soon as you eat them, that familiar guilt bubbles up. Maybe it’s saying, I already had a snack, I don’t need this, or I shouldn’t be eating dessert every day.

Instead of letting that guilt take over, pause and ask yourself, Why do I feel like I’m doing something wrong? Would I tell somebody else they’re doing something wrong by eating these cookies? Probably not. So why is it different for me? By practicing this, you’re not just allowing yourself to eat the foods you enjoy and actually letting yourself enjoy them.

You’re not letting the food have power over you anymore. You’re not making this food mean so much. You’re teaching your brain that food is just food. It doesn’t have to mean more than that. Here’s the thing. Food isn’t just about nourishment, in my opinion. It’s not just something we eat to keep our bodies going.

Sure, some people say they’re happy living that way. They say food is just for fuel and rah rah rah. But that’s not enough for me. And I have a feeling that if you’re listening to this, that’s not enough for you either. Food plays so many different roles in our lives, and if we’re only seeing it through the lens of guilt or control, I feel like we’re missing out on so much.

Think about it. Some of your best memories probably revolve around events with food, but not necessarily because of the food itself, right? It’s what the food represents. Maybe it’s the warm cookies your mom used to bake during the holidays, filling the house with that cozy delicious smell. Or maybe it’s the tradition of gathering around a table with friends or family, sharing stories, laughs, and a great meal.

Food is about connection, tradition, joy. It’s about creating memories, and yes, sometimes it’s about just pleasure. The holiday season especially is a time when food goes way beyond nourishment. It’s a part of tradition. It’s a part of joy and it’s a huge part of connection. Food brings people together.

When you start to look at food more through this lens, it becomes less about the individual items on your plate and more about the experience you’re creating when those items on your plate are no longer consuming you. Maybe it’s your grandma’s homemade pie that she only makes once a year and taking that first bite instantly brings you back to your childhood.

Or maybe it’s a special dish that reminds you of your culture. Or those little appetizers your best friend makes every year that taste like magic. Maybe it’s that warm cup of hot chocolate after coming in from the cold, where every sip feels like a hug. These foods aren’t just about the taste, they’re wrapped in love, memories, and connection.

Food can serve so many roles in our lives. When we get caught up in this idea that food is something we have to earn or feel bad about, we lose sight of the bigger picture. We lose the ability to be present and enjoy the moments food helps create. So let’s take a step back and remind ourselves food is more than just what’s on our plate.

It’s about the memories, relationships, and joy it helps create. And that is worth celebrating. And that’s why you’re working on this now. This shift helps you build a relationship with food based on trust, not fear, not control. You start trusting that you can enjoy food without it spiraling into a binge.

You trust that no food is going to ruin your day or throw you off track. And with that trust comes freedom, freedom from the binge restrict cycle, freedom from guilt and shame, freedom to enjoy life’s moments, food included, without that constant battle in your head. Lean into the experience of food, not just as something you eat, but as something that connects you to people, to memories, and to joy.

Let that be the foundation for your healthier relationship with food. And when you do, you’ll find the urge to binge slowly loses its power. You’ll find peace where there was once chaos. Remember what we said earlier. I’m working on my relationship with food now so I can enjoy every moment later. I’m working on my relationship with food now so I can enjoy every moment later.

Starting with one to two foods this week. You’ve got this.